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Joke of the Day

"Once this whole ""global warming thing"" melts the ice caps We're gonna have a canoe world order."

"I have seasonal depression I'm depressed in the spring, summer, fall and winter"

"Person: Raise your glasses! Me: Hahaha! *raises bottle*"

"(1:35pm) God: Yo Abraham (1:37pm) Abe: sup (1:38pm) God: Need u to kill ur son (1:42pm) Abe: k (4:02pm) God: jk lol (4:10pm) God: u there?"

"The only spanish I know is from the song Feliz Navidad, so these last few days have been my time to shine."

"Me: congrats! Are you pregnant? Her: (awkwardly) Noooo... Me: *panics* do you wanna be? -great save- thanks brain"

"If you're ever feeling stupid, just remember someone invented a wrench and named it Allen"

"I accidentally said ""pastryarchy"" instead of ""patriarchy"" and now I have a vision for a better world"

"What do miss Frizzle and the catholic church have in common? They've both been in little boys."

"What's black and white and red all over and can't get through a revolving door? A nun with a spear through her head."