159749

Joke of the Day

"The only Foursquare location I'd be interested in reading you tweet from is the cave of Bin Laden."

"When I see.... ...lovers' names carved in a tree, I don't think it's sweet. I just think it's surprising how many people bring a knife on a date."

"Him: Boo! Me: Did you just call me your Boo? Him: I was scaring you! Me: Mission accomplished. *backs away*"

"Everyday I walk to work by a Ferrari dealership, put my nose against the etched glass window and say, ""someday I'll own a window this nice."""

"Mothers are always one question from ruining your day."

"How did the Catholic Priest finish the marathon? He was second to Nun."

"If you die in the shower when you're shampooing do the police have to finish rinsing when they find you or is that the ME's job. Is it a job"

"The best way to get over a cold is to get a younger hotter cold"

"What's the difference between a joke on Reddit and a joke on 9Gag? About a day."

"Anybody here named Jeff? Jeff: Yes Geoff: Yeos"