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Joke of the Day

"Coworker: I like working with you. I feel like I can really talk to you Me: I'm sorry I gave you that impression. That's not correct"

"What is feared by jailbirds and splits light into different colors? Prism rape."

"A blond goes to the doctor Blonde: Doctor my skin is very smooth and fair, what should I do before going to sleep? Doctor: Lock the door"

"TIFU when my finger tore through toilet paper while wiping. It was the most ass I'd gotten in a while."

"The Edge falling off stage at that U2 concert... it's comedy on at least two levels."

"What do you get when you mix liquor and literature.... Tequila Mockingbird"

"What did Cinderella say when say got to the ball? *choking sound*"

"Vampires aren't on FB because they can't take pictures of themselves in front of a mirror."

"Who was the famous writer, that died in WWII? I don't know Anne Frankly I don't care."

"You'd think the police would patrol this 'Knifepoint' place more carefully... Especially with all the rape and robberies that are committed there."