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Joke of the Day

"I have never seen the movie Titanic and I never plan to because a friend spoiled the ending for me The boat sinks. Credit to u/Donkey__Xote for this beautiful comment in an r/AskReddit thread"

Next Joke
 
"Three men walk into a bar... One said ouch."
"Q: Why don't blind people skydive more often? A: It scares the hell out of their dogs."
"Man gets arrested by female police officer A man is being arrested by a female police officer, who informs him, ""Anything you say can and will be held against you."" The man replies, ""Boobs!"""
"Why is Obama pro gay marriage? Because he is a cock sucker"
"I must have a great ass Because after leaving a conversation, I always hear someone mumble ""what an ass."""
"so a native american walks into a fancy restaurant he says to the guy seating people, I have reservations."
"Remember, I'm always here if you need shoulders for your ankles to lie on."
"What no running shoes and Neo-Nazis have in common? Both make Jews run faster! (Sorry, but as an agnostic Jew myself, I hope that it's okay for me to make this joke.)"
"Did you hear that Bruce Willis is going to star in a movie where he goes undercover as an elderly nun? It's called Old Habits Die Hard"