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Joke of the Day

"Why did Jill fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she not get back up? Because she had no legs. What did Jill get for Christmas? A bicycle."

"Last night a horse asked me if I was planning on driving home. There might've been a cop on top of it."

"What's worse than 1 slice of burnt toast? The holocaust."

"Medication for depression ""may cause thoughts of suicide"". If this were so for all meds then: Diet Pills..may cause ravenous hunger"

"""Always a bridesmaid, never a bride, was briefly a groom once but that's a long story."" Don't read your girlfriend's diary. Ever."

"Party Tip: At a 3-year-old's birthday party, you can piss all over the bathroom. ALL OVER!!!! Nobody will suspect you."

"Did youhear about the Newfie abortion clinic? It's so busy there's a twelve month waiting list."

"I learned 'I' before 'E' except after 'C' but some words are WEIRD."

"I keep trying to e-mail Mubarak, but all I get is ""Out of Office""."

"Joke of the year. /r/politics"