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Joke of the Day

"Whats fat on the bottom, skinny on the top, and has ears? Mountains! ...what? You've never head of mountaineers?"

"What did Jaws call his solo banking firm? Loan shark."

"How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. They just beat the room for being black. (Just an old one I knew, not sure how common..)"

"How can you go broke making Twinkies when two states just legalized marijuana?"

"My wife says that all she wants is an attentive lover...... ...or maybe it was a tent of lovers. I don't really know, I wasn't paying attention."

"Didja hear that Hershey's is bringing out a new LGBT candy-bar? They're callin it a Lady Bruce."

"What's the difference between fishing and dating? In one you don't want to jerk the hook, but in the other you don't want to hook the jerk."

"How did Jesus feel when they crucified him? He was cross."

"Spruce up your weeknight: run the dishwasher and imagine you're on a cruise!"

"What do you call a group that has gotten nothing done since the 90s The UN"