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Joke of the Day
"Being Santa sounds easy... (NSFW) I've got plenty of experience emptying my sack into socks."
Next Joke
"Young Billy stuck the knife into the outlet... He said it was a shocking surprise."
"What's the difference between America and yoghurt? Yoghurt has culture"
"What is the scariest part of a cavity search? When they put both their hands on your shoulders but keep searching"
"How can a man take an abortion pill? He just picks one up and leaves."
"What's the cheapest kind of meat. Deer balls, they're under a buck."
"The Pink Panther's To Do list: - To do - To do - To do, to do, to do, to do, to doooo"
"What do you get if you cross Donald Trump with a reddit user? your mother"
"[at daycare] Me: I'm here to pick up my son Daycare: what's he look like? Me: *points to my face* D: oh. Ok"
"*Approaches girl at bar* Brain: Say you like her eyes. No, hair. Actually, go for eyes! Me: You have lovely hairy eyes Brain: My bad."