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Joke of the Day

"Be nice to people on your way up so they won't get suspicious when you're rich and you invite them to your island to hunt them for sport."

"what do you call a communist in a hurry? A soviet rushin! (wackady shmackady doo)"

"What's long and hard when you first put in in your mouth, but soft and wrinkly when you take it out? A piece of gum, you pervert!"

"whats the diffrence between a tornado and a divorce in the south? nothing. sombodys losing a trailer!"

"How do you scare a man Sneak up behind him and start throwing rice"

"A black guy, an illegal alien, a Muslim, and a communist walk into a bar... The bartender asks, ""What can I get you Mr. President?"" ;-P"

"What do you call the death of a superior? A promotional opportunity."

"I sure get a lot of compliments on my people skills for someone who flips off 10 people every day."

"6.8 billion people in the world and I just had to make my own sandwich."

"I enjoy long romantic walks to the fridge."