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Joke of the Day

"What did the rat say to the cat? Nothing, cats don't talk you fucking idiot."

"Q: If everyone in America started driving pink cadillacs, what would you have? A: A pink car nation."

"Opinions are like orgasms. I don't care if a woman has one."

"What do you mean you're not going to spank me? I mouthed off and everything. What kind of man are you?"

"My girlfriend and I use ""laundry"" as a code-word for sex. Her dad asked me why I couldn't do the laundry by myself so I told him ""it's a big load""."

"Hey mate! Your girl looks like a horse... Are you in a stable relationship?"

"Is it too much to ask for an attractive hot stalker....I mean, come on, seriously!"

"I'm sick and tired of people telling me to turn off my lights to save the environment. I tried it once and I hit a cyclist."

"What did Mustafa's dad say after he founded Turkey? attaturk."

"How many protesters does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question. Protesters never change anything."