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Joke of the Day

"It doesn't bother me when people tell me my dick is a joke. But I love it when they can take a joke."

"Doctor doctor my baby's swallowed a bullet Well don't point him at anyone until I get there!"

"Professor: What is an independent variable? Student: A variable who don't need no man"

"Why does the mermaid wear seashells? She grew out of her b-shells."

"As an English person there's one thing I love between me and the French. The English Channel."

"In Japan, they are celebrating their position as the most educated country in the world. Here in America it's National Cheeseburger Day."

"The gift that keeps on giving Herpes. Hehe ;)"

"Surprised to hear five people were shot at a Chris Brown show, most notably because why were there that many people at a Chris Brown show?"

"How can you tell if your girlfriend is getting fat? She fits into your wife's clothes"

"If you look in your bathroom mirror & say ""Donald Trump"" 3 times, the hair in your shower drain rises up & starts yelling racist slurs."