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Joke of the Day
"I don't normally cook. How much vodka do you add to the mashed potatoes?"
Next Joke
"I'm blonde. What's your excuse?"
"What did the Chinese man give his daughter? A clothes hanger."
"Where does a bee put its stinger? In its honey"
"One old song. A thousand old memories."
"""My dad could blow up your dad!"" - braggy al-Qaeda kid"
"What's Ted Cruz's favorite food? Boogers. This isn't a joke. Ted Cruz eats his boogers."
"Why do clowns hate assassins? Because they go for the juggler."
"My dog is coming home from surgery today and I hope he did ok. He can't afford another malpractice suit."
"""Give it to me"" she screamed ""Give it to me I'm so fucking wet!"" But try as she might, she wasn't getting my umbrella."