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Joke of the Day
"We had an assignment on terrorists in school once. I bombed it of course"
Next Joke
"How many ants does it take to screw in a light bulb? A light bulb weighs about 50g and a single ant can lift about .2g, so it takes somewhere around 250 ants working together."
"I saw this farmer milking a baby cow and I thought to myself ""How could anybody stoop that low?"""
"You can't swing a dead cat without hitting someone crazy here! Of course, if you're swinging a dead cat you probably shouldn't be so judgy."
"When I jerk off I like to sit on my other hand until it gets numb, then change to that hand right at the last minute . . . I call it ""the old 'bate and switch""!"
"Customer: Why don't you eat here waiter? Waiter: Serving it is bad enough I don't want to compound the felony."
"My grandfather said he'd never be caught dead wearing cargo pants, so I slipped the funeral director an extra 50 bucks. And now we wait."
"Why don't witches wear underwear? They have to grip the broom."
"What do bed detectives solve? Pillow cases"
"Sorry your dad died. Here's a card with a waterfall on it"