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Joke of the Day
"Grandma, the words are very similar, but you ""butt dialed"" me. You didn't booty call me."
Next Joke
"Wife to her husband:""Why do you stand in the balcony every time I sing classical?"" The husband replies ""So that the neighbors don't think I'm fucking you forcibly"""
"A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool So I gave him a glass of water."
"Do you want to hear a joke about sodium? Na"
"Just because something is meant for kids doesn't mean it won't be amusing for adults. Boobs are a great example."
"Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over? Me: Technically I pulled myself over, you only asked C: I know, right? They make us say it like that"
"How come north Carolina is the bluest state? Raleigh scattering"
"""911, what's your emergency?"" Me: A cute guy at the laundromat walked past me while I was folding my period underwear."
"I've been diagnosed with kleptomania... when it gets really bad, I have to take something."
"If I had a face like yours, I'd sue my parents."