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Joke of the Day

"So i was at lunch with a small girl she kept complainin bout how she wanted vanilla ice cream so i said this girl like ice cream cuz she as white as vanilla!"

"Can I go to a spa and hire someone to pop the pimples on my back? Like what do single people do about back pimples?"

"My friend asked me if i wanted to go to Yoga class with her. I replied.... ""NahImmastay"""

"If you're head of the CIA and can't hide an extramarital affair it means it can't be done. Case closed, fellas."

"Don't you hate people that answer their own questions? I do."

"What's the best part about dating a homeless chick? You can drop her off wherever."

"It's very easy to clean yourself to the tune of ""Uptown Funk"". Don't believe me? Just wash."

"Why can't the cops keep calm and carry on ? Because they carry guns instead"

"Most offensive joke I've ever heard So I was going down on this old lady when I tasted horse semen. So I stopped and said ""Oh grandma, that's how you died"""

"Why did the Russian man get food poisoning? Because NE-coli."