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Joke of the Day

"Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms."

"SALMON: Who has been spreading gossip I thought I could trust you two TROUT: I don't know, who could it be?! BIG MOUTH BASS: Yeah, who??"

"Have you seen the new fishing website? No it's not online yet."

"An old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor. He ordered a banana split. The waitress asked, Crushed nuts? No, he said. Arthritis."

"What is long and hard for a black guy? Third grade"

"I had a serious talk with my girlfriend after she told me about her rape fantasy. It actually went pretty well too... Ending with me whispering in her ear, ""shut the fuck up or I cut you bitch"""

"A refrigerator is the exact opposite of a drug addict. It starts off in a box and then moves to a house."

"What kind of pants does Mario wear? Denim denim denim..."

"A fight or flight situation. Like when you go to pick up your kid and the teacher's walking towards you with ""the look"" on her face."

"God I'm so stupid I was looking all over for my car keys, turns out they were on my head the entire time."