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Joke of the Day
"What's the absolute worst city to live in? An atroCITY."
Next Joke
"A blind guy once told me, ""Kid you're going to go places."" I told him, ""Dude. I'm over here."""
"Text from mom: How's my baby girl? Me: I'm moving back in. Mom: Your room is ready. Me: No, your uterus! Mom: Steph you drink too much"
"My girlfriend called me a pedophile. I said, ""Wow, that's a pretty big word for a eight year old."""
"Me: do you love me? Siri: I'm only your assistance. Me: if you don't, I will jump off a bridge. Siri:there are two bridges near you."
"Why did the fork go to the party? It wanted to have a good tine."
"Ladies and gentlemen, my browsing history... [deleted]"
"Today I accidentally hit on the mirror It cracked me up"
"What did one casket say to the other casket? ""Is that you coffin?'"
"10% luck... 20% skill 15% concentrated power of will 5% pleasure 50% pain 100% reason to remember *the game.*"