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Joke of the Day

"I hate being bi-polar... It's awesome!"

"GTA V for the PC is taking so long to release... all of the radio stations will play classic hits."

"What's the worst thing you're likely to find in the school cafeteria? The food!"

"Don't tell me about how you ""dressed up"" your baby for a special occasion. If you're wearing something you can shit in you aren't dressed up"

"How do you grow a cow? Plant its nuts."

"Apple and Puma have developed smart track pants, they're called iPumaPants."

"For every chick that's crying about no good guys out there...there's a dude she's ignoring that's good to her."

"My girlfriend told me to fuck her like a man. So I stuck it in her ass and called her Steve"

"I reverse engineered a time machine... Eureka!"

"What do you call a flying bagel? A plane bagel."