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Joke of the Day

"A couple split up over Christmas cause the man wanted a Playstation... Instead he got an ex-box"

"Matthew McConaughey's acting secret is that he always just came"

"Waving my hand impatiently in front of the automatic door sensor so everyone knows I am too important to wait for electricity."

"What's the difference between a feminist and a battery? Batteries have a positive side! inspired by: http://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/2zlrot/how_many_feminists_does_it_take_to_change_a/"

"Are you going to take a bath? No I'm leaving it where it is."

"What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up? The Army."

"I wanted to sue the airline because they damaged my luggage. I showed the badly damaged remains to my lawyer. He said ""You don't have much of a case."""

"Question: What's the difference between dating a redhead and putting your hand in a blender? Answer: There's always a 50/50 chance the blender isn't on"

"What do you call an ugly rabbit that sits on someone's forehead? Unsightly facial hare!"

"Why did the priest dislike geometry? It's sin-ful. [self made joke]"