155092

Joke of the Day

"The navigator of the Titanic dashed to the Captain's deck. Navigator: ""Sir, if we keep heading that way we will hit the iceberg! We have to change course now!!"" Captain: ""but it's unsinkable."""

"What do alcoholics and necrophiliacs have in common? They both love to crack open a cold one."

"What's the difference between art and junk? A plaque."

"I was watching a porno I was watching a porn film earlier, was just a sad fat bloke masturbating and weeping.....then I realized I hadn't turned the tv on :("

"how do you keep bacon from curling in the pan? You take away their tiny brooms."

"What does Sonic the Hedgehog wear when he goes to the beach? A speedo"

"I wonder if Southern Belles say ""I do declare"" a lot when they're doing their taxes."

"Any girl who says she's not the jealous type will change her tune when another girl phones you drunk at 3am."

"Oh, you're about to earn your 3rd master's degree? I'm still working on spelling ""bananas"" without singing ""Hollaback Girl"" in my head."

"Did you hear about the circus fire? It was in tents!"