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Joke of the Day

"There is a new virus which only affects Muslims.Where do they put the infected? In the Quran-tine room!"

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"How many magazines did the racquetball footwear company make before going out of business? Tennis shoes (Also: can anyone think of a more succinct buildup? It seems kinda unwieldy to me)"
"If you are skydiving and your parachute doesn't open, don't worry You've got the rest of your life to fix it."
"""even if my client did kill his wife, think of the 7.4 billion people he DIDN'T kill."" - my first and last day as a defense attorney"
"ME: *pulling up my pants* What's the prognosis, Doc? DOCTOR: You've got cancer. ME: WHAT?! DOCTOR: Haha. Jk. I'm not a doctor."
"I heard diaria is hereditary It runs through your jeans"
"I tied a rope and swallowed it I shit you knot!"
"These sex jokes are in really poor taste and they need to stop. I mean, cum on, guys."
"Why bother drinking water? You're just gonna pee it out. This is what Big Water doesn't want you to know."
"Which company makes the best apple cider? Dicken's. Because everyone wants their Dicken's Cider."
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