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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the Italian chef? He *pasta* away."

"When I was just a little girl, I asked my mother what will I be. Will I be pretty, will I be rich? Here's what she said to me: GO TO SLEEP."

"A boy said to his father one day, ""Dad, when I grow up I want to be a musician."" His father responded, ""I'm sorry, son, you can't have it both ways."""

"BOSS: it's national replace H's with F's day ME: really? BOSS: yep, you're hired! ME: hahaha-wait BOSS: get out ME: what the huck?"

"I don't get what's so great about hand jobs. She's always ends up falling asleep by the time I get her whole hand in my mouth."

"Forget everything you learned in college... ...You won't need it working here.' 'But I never went to college.' 'Well then, I'm sorry. You are under qualified to work here.'"""

"Superman: Only one cookie left. Batman: Rock, paper, scissors for it? Superman: 1, 2, 3, GO! Batman: *pulls out Kryptonite and eats cookie*"

"Offered the kids $5 to clean so they could learn about money and then didn't pay them so they could learn about randomly trusting people."

"Why are linux geeks very introvertish ? Because they never get out of their shell"