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Joke of the Day

"Jimmy: Khaleesi, of course means Queen. What's your real name again? Khaleesi (Kristen Wiig): Karen"

"Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil!"

"You've got to really be careful when ingesting shoes... cause they're usually laced"

"How many perverts does it take to put in a light bulb? Only one, but... It takes the entire ER department to get it back out."

"If I ever need to ask for directions, I will find an Asian person, because who better to help me get Oriented?"

"My most pretentious joke. Knock knock. Who's there? To. To who? To whom."

"I had a neurotic rabbit once. His name was Stu."

"A little girl says to her mother, ""Mommy, I want to be a feminist when i grow up"" Her mother replies, ""Well pick one, Honey. You can't do both."""

"Q: How many retarded Italian gardeners does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: One but don't expect results."

"who paid? Wednesday, Tom and Joe went to a restaurant and ate dinner. When they were done they paid for the food and left. But Tom and Joe didn't pay for the food. Who did?"