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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the guy who was frozen to absolute zero? He was 0K."

"Why do blacks raise chickens? To teach their kids how to walk."

"I love linguistics Its the only class where I can talk about vowel movements."

"What grows when you plant a pumpkin spice latte and water it with vodka? A sorority."

"You don't sweat much for a fat chick."

"What is white, moody, easy to beat and makes me do stupid stuff? My penis."

"My friend thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face."

"[Restaurant] Waiter: Compliments of the chef. *He opens silver platter and post-it notes with the words 'You're beautiful' pour out*"

"Time zones are amazing, it's a different time all around the world. For example, in some parts of the U.S. it's still 1950."

"What's the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Beer nuts are a dollar fifty but deer nuts are under a buck."