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Joke of the Day
"What did the x-axis say to the y-axis? This is my domain"
Next Joke
"Soccer player calls his wife after a game... Player: ""I scored two goals!!"" Wife: ""Great! What was the end scored?"" Player: ""1:1"""
"*puts a picture of Roger Rabbit in a picture frame* I did it. I framed Roger Rabbit."
"How could a leper afford a nice house? It cost an arm and a leg"
"why was 6 afraid of 7? fear of commitment due to a lifetime of disappointment and heartbreak"
"This Heat is Like a Middle Eastern Dictator... This Heat is Like a Middle Eastern Dictator. It's oppressive, you can't get away from it, and I'm pretty sure we can blame the U.S. for it."
"3 Year Old: Mommy, was daddy ever inside you like I was? Wife: Yes. But only for a minute... two tops. Me: ..."
"When your baby cries, don't feed it. That's just what it expects you to do. You have to outsmart it."
"What do you get when you cross an elephant with a poodle? A dead poodle with an 18 inch wide asshole."
"Alright! Everyone that got a DM containing a map to my treehouse, meet there in 15 mins. Those who didn't, maybe consider being nicer to me."