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Joke of the Day

"Looking forward to his next movie Night at the Mausoleum"

"I had a harder childhood than most. My parents didn't send me to a therapist, they sent me to a theanalrapist."

"What happened to the minter who went crazy? He stopped making cents."

"""Tom Brady did nothing wrong"" is Boston's ""The Confederate Flag isn't really about slavery."""

"Me: How are you? Co-worker: *Gives 20 minute dissertation on their gastro infection*"

"""GENTLEMEN, WE ARE AT WAR WITH TROY AND WE MUST NOT DROP OUR GUARD FOR ANYTHING"" ""sir, the enemy gave us a giant wooden horse"" ""Oh rad, bring it in"""

"What did the male computer say to the female computer? He said: ""Ay gurl, I'd like to put my twisted-pair cable into your RJ45 jack so I can fill you up with my sweet, sweet data frames""."

"Did you guys know a Mexican's brain is the most expensive out all the race? Because its brand new and never been used"

"At McDonalds Cashier: You total is to tell your kids that you love them Me: Look lady if I loved them I wouldn't be feeding them this crap"

"I had a package delivered And it was covered in drool and crayon. That's the last time I pay for a special delivery."