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Joke of the Day

"if you're hiding from a deranged killer and forget to put your phone on silent, at least make the ringtone the benny hill theme."

Next Joke
 
"What is the difference between an old bus depot and a lobster with boobs? One is a busty crustacean and the other is a crusty bus station."
"what happens when a frogs car breaks down? it gets toad"
"I sleep better naked...why can't the flight attendant understand this?"
"Whats Irish and stays out all night? Patty O'Furniture"
"The greatest thing about Christmas is how it teaches kids to be selfish little shits on someone else's birthday."
"Acorns must come from France. That would explain the tiny berets."
"""if you could be any animal what would you be"" a cat ""why a cat"" [imagines being a complete shithead for literally no reason] naps and stuff"
"You remind me of my pinky toe. You're small, cute, and I'm probably going to bang you on the coffee table later tonight"
"So a horse walks into a bar... And many people leave because that is a safety hazard"
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