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Joke of the Day

"A bunch of homeless people moved in at a local gyn They heard there was other people squatting there."

"You know how you'll see something a million times, but can't find it when you need it? That's why I stopped buying condoms."

"Why did the clock phone the ruler? Because desperate times call for desperate measures...."

"According to the Encyclopedia Brittanica, the Native American ""Trail of Tears"" has been redefined as anywhere that Chuck Norris walks."

"I bought a wash basin from a skydiver today. And tomorrow he's going to *plummet* in for me."

"I was never a photogenic person, because when everyone said cheese I said ""WHERE ?"""

"Tell me you love me. Then get in the kitchen, make me a sandwich and let me play my video games so I know it's real"

"They say that time heals all wounds... But what if you get hit in the head with a clock?"

"Life is a soup And I'm a fork"

"you should be able to order mcnuggets in any quantity. just have a flat price for a single nug, like a quarter. i feel strongly about this."