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Joke of the Day
"Dating tip: if you want a girl to hold you tight, start pushing her off a cliff."
Next Joke
"Caitlin Jenner's name should be Trans Trans Jenner"
"What's the similarity between a gay man and a toothpick? They both poke around in old food"
"If the fortune has turned her back on you, you can do whatever you want behind her back."
"I once borrowed a pro-life campaigner's laptop. The desktop was filled with accidentally-created New Folder icons."
"Never trust an atom They make up everything."
"Sarah Palin being on a climate change panel with Bill Nye is like Sarah Palin being on a climate change panel with Bill Nye."
"Friend: How's the wine? Me: It's exCHARDONNARY Friend: *taking my glass away* No."
"My boyfriend isn't allowed to break up with me. You wanna see other people? Look out the window."
"I dated a girl once who turned out to be a cannibal. That really came back to bite me in the ass."