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Joke of the Day

"Two TV antennas got married last weekend. The wedding was nothing special, but the reception was excellent."

"The midget fortune teller who kills his customers is a small medium at large"

"Money doesnt grow on trees? So then why do banks have branches?"

"What's the difference between men and women? Women play hard to get. Men get hard to play."

"I dig, you dig, we dig, he dig, she dig, they dig. Its not a beautiful poem, but its very deep."

"How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just shoot the room for being black."

"Magic A magician is driving down a road and turns into a driveway."

"""The auditors have just left sir."" ""Did they check the books?"" ""Very thoroughly."" ""What did they say?"" ""They want 15% to keep quiet."""

"Hey everyone look I'm really sorry because I know we JUST buried the casket but I'm 75% sure my wallet fell in there and I was wondering if"

"What is long, hard and full of semen A submarine"