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Joke of the Day

"White smoke is coming out of my neighbor's house. He either elected a new Pope or he's got some good weed."

"What do you call a Mexican that acts like a white person? A wiener"

"A Jew, A Christian, A Lawyer, A Doctor, A Blonde, and a Biker walk into a bar........ the bartender goes ""what is this some kind of joke or something?!"""

"Mickey Mouse wants a divorce. ""Mickey Mouse, it says you want to divorce Minnie because she was... extremely silly?"" ""No, I said she was fucking Goofy"""

"How did the midget feel when he found out he was retarded? A little Down."

"in the rental car today and my son said it was like we were in a ""rocket ship"" how many rocket ships have you been in. That's what I thought"

"Why don't ants get sick? Because of their tiny little anty bodies"

"My wife ordered a pizza from Papa John's but I saved a step by throwing up before it got here."

"Turning to an episode of Seinfeld and discovering it's one you've never seen is like finding a twenty dollar bill in your pocket."

"Did you hear about the NASCAR driver who went the wrong way around the track? It turned out to be all right."