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Joke of the Day

"When I see a couple sharing the same facebook account I always want to ask them which one of you got caught having an affair"

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"""I can't believe it's not butter!"" could be a disappointed statement as well. I'd like the context before I buy."
"What's the difference between the G-Spot and Jack Daniels? I'll actually look for the Jack Daniels."
"Telling a woman to get back in the kitchen is a weird insult to lob on Twitter. We can still tweet from kitchens. We have wifi & data plans."
"Cop wives... Fuck the police."
"Some people They're kind of like STDs , at first you don't like them, and then they start to grow on you."
"What did the pirate say when his wife kept asking him about the steering wheel in his pants? ""Yargg! Woman! Stop asking me! You're driving me nuts!"""
"{Commercial for Floors} Is this you? {footage of man falling endlessly to oblivion}"
"Who loves hamburgers French fries and ants? Ronald MacAardvark!"
"A Toledo man was admitted to the city hospital last night with severe burns after dunking for French fries at a Halloween party."