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Joke of the Day

"Him: *down on one knee* Will you marry me? Me: Nah, I'm good, but... (puts up hand up to high five) thanks for asking!"

"Hey baby, are you a C major scale? 'Cause you look all natural to me."

"Why are teachers happy at Halloween parties? Because there's lots of school spirit!"

"Pedophiles They're fucking immature assholes."

"Reddit is red. Reddit is red, Facebook is blue.... No mutual friends, Who the fuk are u?"

"Drinking American beer is like making love in a canoe... It's fucking too close to water."

"I'm not as tweet as you drunk I am think."

"Dad: Son.. Get me that Doptid Son: What's a Doptid Dad : You are..."

"How do you kill a one-legged fox? Make him run across Canada."

"There are six American flags on the Moon. Five of them are still standing. Due to the strong UV radiation, they are all completely white by now. So it looks like the French landed there."