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Joke of the Day

"Today, I lost my mood ring. I don't know how I feel about that..."

"My track record as an adult is mostly false starts, hurdles and running around in a circle."

"One day a man met three beggars. To the first he gave a dime to the second a dime and to the third a nickel. What time was it? A quarter to three."

"For Sale: 2-in-1 Menthol Shampoo Great hairwash. Mint condition."

"So I was at a sushi restaurant last night. I saw they had this Orgasm roll. I tried it, but I couldn't finish."

"those damn vegans still drinking water?!?! That's a fish's house, you nasty savages!!"

"A man is suing a hardware for selling him a bucket with holes in it. Personally, I don't think his argument holds water."

"I've never bitten off more than I can chew, but once I put too much mouthwash in my mouth and couldn't swish it around."

"Q: How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb? A: It takes two. One to change the bulb and the other to kick the switch."

"What did the gynecologist say to his sedated patient? I don't know, his voice was muffled."