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Joke of the Day

"(SPOILERS) What kind of car did J.J. Abrams send to pick up Harrison Ford for the new Star Wars premiere? A Hyundai."

"My parents just said they want another child. ""I'd love a sibling!"" I said. ""That's not what we meant."" they replied."

"If ANY of my posts have made even one person's day better,, then there's something seriously wrong with that person"

"(OC) What did the auditors say to the South American shopkeeper? Hello, I'm here to Peru-se your inventory."

"A woman asks a bartender for a double entendre He gave her one"

"Give a fish a worm, he lives another day Teach a fish to worm, he becomes the best breakdancing fish around"

"What do you call the space in between Pamela Anderson's breasts? Silicon Valley"

"Have you heard of the grammar nazi? He is really anti-semantic..."

"When does a Smurf pull his pants down? Once in a blue moon."

"I don't want a boyfriend. Just someone to call me beautiful, love me right, and fix the clogged drain in my bathtub. Mostly the drain thing."