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Joke of the Day

"Trump says ""The less immigrants we let into our country the better!"" Pence, correcting Trump, says ""The Fewer"" Trump says ""Whoa Mike don't call me that just yet"""

"TIFU by eating my coworkers sandwich Oops, wrong sub"

"If you're going to have a beer with Russian's You better Czech yourself before you wreck yourself. Edit:FUCK I JUST REALIZED HOW BAD THIS JOKE IS"

"You know, those people who insult Obama and the Clintons.. really need to stop beating around the Bush."

"Strong Winds by Gail Force"

"Someone should invent padded underwear for men to get back at women for wearing pushup bras"

"Why does Japan have a high life expectancy? It is full of anti - occidents"

"What type of music do astronauts love? Neptunes!"

"NORMAL PEOPLE: ""aww, they're such a cute couple"" ME: ""I wonder if they fu***d yet"""

"Procrastination is like masturbation: it is fun and feels good but in the end you've only fucked yourself."