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Joke of the Day

"Do you ever just look at a girl and instantly know she posts her daily horoscope on Facebook and quotes Marilyn Monroe?"

"Inflation: Being broke with a lot of money in your pocket."

"What's gray, disappointing, and in the shape of an oval?"

"Chuck Norris owns a chain of fast-food restaurants throughout the southwest. They serve nothing but barbecue-flavored ice cream and Hot Pockets."

"I'm drunk and ready to get retarded! Wait, that's not politically correct. I'm soberly-challenged and ready to get retarded!"

"If Trump deports all the Mexicans Who's going to build the wall?"

"What do you call someone who can't turn pancakes? A flip-flop."

"that's a rather intricate bullet proof vest ur wearing ""this is a front-side baby carrier. this is my baby.."" dude that's messed up"

"The bible says you can't buy your way into heaven but there isn't a church in the country that won't encourage you to try."

"Hangovers vs Women Why are hangovers better than women? Hangovers go away!"