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Joke of the Day

"Movies Lesson #5: very few people die while trying to get from one hotel room to another using the ledge outside, so give it a shot."

"My first broadway show was about puns. It was a play on words."

"I overheard someone say all Asians are ninjas. I would've told him how racist that sounded but he was black and I didn't want to get mugged."

"A Florida police dog is being fired after biting two people; but to be fair, who wouldn't want to hurt people from Florida?"

"Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead."

"The most popular guy in a fraternity will always end up working at a mobile phone kiosk in the mall."

"Surprised to learn that famed pornography company American Apparel has entered the clothing business."

"Fool me once, shame on you. Fool Chuck Norris once and he will roundhouse you in the face."

"My horoscope says I will meet the woman of my dreams today. Not sure how my wife will take the news but I'm pretty damn excited."

"Do you know whats really odd? Numbers not divisible by 2."