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Joke of the Day

"Scientists have finally discovered the secret of longevity of hedgehogs... ...It turns out, there is no secret. They don't even live that long."

"When I asked for my wife's hand in marriage, I didn't realize how often I'd just get the finger."

"Listen. You've been saying this for the last eight and a half months. I still don't know what you're ""expecting"""

"My fortune cookie read ""End of roll. Replace"""

"Hitler Joke Hitler is smarter than you. At least he knew when to kill himself. ( )"

"How do you know a guitarist is sad? They start to fret."

"What do you call a bell which doesn't do it's work? A rebell"

"""Hey is BB hungry?"" ""No BB-8."""

"I once thought about suicide. Then I realised that there's probably better things to name our child."

"[Job interview] ""Can you explain this gap in your resume?"" Me: ""I fell asleep on the space key."""