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Joke of the Day

"""Wow, that's great!"" ~ Me, not paying attention, and hoping you didn't just tell me your Grandma died."

"What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Lickalottapuss"

"She said she wanted to bump uglies. So, naturally, I got all showered & freshened up and then I rammed my Ford Pinto into her Honda Element."

"*forward*reverse*forward* *reverse*forward*reverse*... --someone in an electric wheelchair giving a blowjob."

"How do you address a Black Farmer? Through his owner."

"Waiter is there soup on the menu ? No madam I wiped it off !"

"Ever hear about the Jesus Bomb? Red bull and merlot"

"What is the difference between a human dad and a moth dad? Two letters."

"How do you paint a wall with dead babies? It depends how hard you throw them."

"chuck norris went on a hike up mount st helens on may 18 1980. then he had to take a dump..."