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Joke of the Day
"What do you give a sick snake ? Asp-rin !"
Next Joke
"I heard my son's girlfriend screaming ""Oh God!"" in his bedroom upstairs ... Im so glad he found a good religious girl."
"My wife walked in on me and found me f***ing our daughter... I didn't know what she found more disturbing, the fact I was f***ing our daughter, or that the abortion clinic sold me her fetus."
"Why does Luke Skywalker never have trouble getting laid? Because he always uses the force."
"Why Couldn't Hellen Keller Drive? Because she is a woman."
"[obama cures cancer, invents hoverboards, saves baby by killing 3 lions with a flurry of devastating headbutts] Americans: LION KILLER OMG"
"I was driving one day and saw a field full of scrawny cows, and thought... ... so THAT's where beef jerky comes from."
"Q: How does a blonde interpret 6.9? A: A 69 interrupted by a period."
"why do pedophiles make good employers? they don't mind if you're a little behind."
"People who tweet a lot of motivational stuff on here are the same people who reminded the teacher she forgot to give out homework."