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Joke of the Day

"Spain at the 2014 World Cup"

"They should pass out condoms at the election That way the American people can at least be safe when they're fucked"

"Holy shit a street psychic just stopped me & said I'm a special person who cares deeply about some things & I'm freaking 'cause that's SO me"

"A mother walked in to find her son playing with his privates. ""Oh dear..."" ""...those toy soldiers were supposed to be a surprise!"""

"I'd like to dedicate this joke to my father, who was a roofer... ...so...dad, if you're up there..."

"Sometimes when I type my brother smashes my keyboard. But luckily it doesn't happen ofteklansiurbkjgnv hgaikuwh GI;OOR;KGHKJh klwhkjalhdhakjshdilBILWU HP KJn kjlgn"

"America: Where stairs are only used for emergency escape purposes."

"The grammar teacher said ""In English, two negatives make an affirmative, but two affirmatives never make a negative."" A student replied... ""Yeah, right!"""

"What do you call someone who's been kicked out of a fraternity? Hasbro."

"Wrong number Some guy keeps texting ""stand and deliver"" to me. I keep telling him he's got the wrong number, but he's adamant"