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Joke of the Day
"""You never told me you were vegan!"" - no one ever"
Next Joke
"OMG THIS ACTUALLY WORKS! 1. hold breath 5 mins 2. die"
"Did you hear about the shy masturbating turtle? he really came out of his shell"
"Best goldfish joke ever told Two goldfish were in their tank. One turned to the other and said, ""You man the guns; I'll drive."""
"A man's wife died. friend asked what happend He said, she fell out from windows; as she was not drinking the poison."
"What's blue and doesn't weigh much? Light blue"
"What happened to the Oklahoma Territories? I don't know but they're OK now."
"What do rappers use to write their lyrics? Word,yo."
"My toddler is learning to speak so I'm trying to teach him some phrases for social success. Things like ""true dat"" and ""pass the gravy."""
"A Truck full of terrapins going north and a truck full of tortoises going south... They collide. It was a turtle disaster."