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Joke of the Day
"What's the most consumed beverage by Syrians? Saltwater."
Next Joke
"Two Wrongs Don't Make a Right... Just like two thongs don't make it tight."
"How to calm a crying baby: 1. Pick it up. 2. Ok, so when it turns like 5 you can put it back down. Good luck."
"Starting a cover band called ""A Book"" so no one can judge us."
"What has four legs, and if it fell out of a tree it'd kill you? A pool table"
"Oral contraceptive I recently had an experience with oral contraceptives. I asked a woman if she would like have sex with me. She said, ""No""."
"[signing birth certificate] wife: you put Owen, right? me: yup nurse: Now we'll just need a footprint from little [reading] ""Owned"""
"Dopted Dad: Have you seen an animal named Dopted? Son: What's a Dopted? Dad: You are. You're adopted."
"My new years resolution is the same as last year. 1920x1080"
"I cheated on my girlfriend once. I was playing monopoly and I took some money from the bank when she wasn't looking. Then I went upstairs and fucked her sister."