145362

Joke of the Day

"Why do Jewish women love to be prostitutes? You got it, you sell it, you still got it."

"How many seconds are there in one year? 12 of them: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd, May 2nd, June 2nd, July 2nd, August 2nd, September 2nd, October 2nd, November 2nd, December 2nd."

"My biggest fear is laughing at a joke I didn't understand and someone asks me to explain it to them."

"I hate it when people call me contrary. I am *not* contrary!"

"Picture the perfect woman. Wrong. You're a guy. You're always wrong."

"These Alt-Right people should Ctrl+Alt-Right+Delete themselves from American society, Am I right?!"

"What doesn't belong in this list: Meat, Eggs, Wife, Blowjob? Blowjob: You can beat your meat, eggs, or wife, but you can't beat a blowjob."

"Son: ""Mom, Dad.. I'm gay"" Mom: *staring at dad Dad: ...*clenches fists Mom: ...don't! Dad: *sweats profusely Mom: Dad: HI GAY, IM DAD Kudos to @Lerky on Twitter"

"The only people I know I'm superior to are the ones who announce the break they're taking from Facebook."

"Since the pharmacy keeps making it harder to buy decongestants, I've just started making them at home from crystal meth."