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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a dog with no limbs? Doesn't really matter it won't come anyway"

"What did the mortician say to the corpse? We're gonna need more lube."

"R2-D2 was the most vulgar movie character of all time... They bleeped out every word he said!"

"I can't wait until I'm 69. It's going to be hilarious."

"A scoliosis patient had given up hope of recovery.. But after the long and painful surgery, he took his first steps and humbly said ""I stand corrected""."

"1,058,675,954,897 base-36 That is all."

"""I hope this makes them name a radioactive turtle after me"" Michelangelo thought as he painted the Sistine Chapel ""that would be hella rad"""

"What has 9 arms and sucks? Fed Leapord."

"idk about you but I still remember what I was doing when I found out Kennedy had been shot: sitting at home, reading the JFK Wikipedia page"

"It would be nice to spend billions on schools and roads, but right now that money is desperately needed for political ads."