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Joke of the Day
"*God provides manna from heaven* ""Is there gluten in this?"""
Next Joke
"Super excited about staying at my daughter's place so I can eat her cereal and leave the empty box in her cupboard."
"""Four more years! Four more years! Four more years!"" The parole board chants, as I enter my hearing. This was not a good sign."
"You wont find a whole lot about beastiality in the bible. But you will in my diary."
"I've finally understood the meaning of ""politics"" It's derived from ""poly"", the Greek word for ""many"", and ""tics"", a blood sucking parasite."
"Two things I learned from online dating geography and disappointment"
"Finding girls is like playing blackjack. I always try to go for 21 but end up hitting on 14."
"Sometimes I'll stop the treadmill at the gym and run in place. When people ask me what I'm doing, I'll say, ""Pretend stoplight."""
"Have you heard about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now."
"Donald Trump says he went to the University of Pennsylvania, but I could have sworn he went to Syracuse. Because he sure is an Orange Man."