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Joke of the Day

"Two pedophiles are on a beach One says to the other ""Can you move you're in my sun"""

"The thunder god.. sat upon his favourite Filly, I'm Thor, He Cried! The Horse replied, You forgot your thaddle thilly"

"Why do vacuums machines make for such terrible hairdriers? because they suck."

"Twitter is the new flypaper."

"There were four cats in a boat one jumped out. How many were left ? None. They were all copy cats !"

"What do you call a teacher that doesn't fart in public? A private tutor (tooter) Heard it from a guy on the street selling newspapers in front of the art institute in chicago."

"""You hang UP."" ""No, YOU hang UP."" - Movie theater workers arguing about hanging movie poster for Up."

"Why do teenage girls travel in odd numbered groups? Because they can't even"

"A lot of you are calling me ""mom"" lately. Is it cause I'm old? Or cause you respect me? I hope for your sake it's cause I'm old."

"What's black on top and white underneath? Rape. Offensive jokes are fine as long as they are still jokes."