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Joke of the Day

"Went to see a psychic without an appointment and he wasn't expecting me ?"

"When in Rome... Crucify Jesus"

"Who's that one armed rockstar drummer? Oh yeah, Phil Rudd. Too soon?"

"How do you get a Jewish girls number? Check her wrists."

"What do you call a man with no arms and no legs who's trying to get home? A taxi"

"A strange woman was pounding at my door at 4am and woke me up. I had to let her out."

"Did you see the newspaper report about the midget psychiatrist wanted by the police.... The headline said ""Small medium at large""... I'll see myself out!"

"My neighbor's wife asked me if I wanted to help make her husband jealous... I said ""sure!"" and hung myself in the bedroom closet."

"A guy with a rock on his head hit someone and was charged with basalt and hattery."

"What do Angels fans and gay men both have in common? They both love Pujols"