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Joke of the Day

"Get your employees to work harder by ""accidentally"" leaving articles on the printer about reducing staff."

"What do identical stars do? Twin-kle"

"How do Mexicans cut their pizza? Little Caesars"

"The state of New Mexico.. When they named the state of New Mexico were they degrading the state or honoring Mexico? it seemed funnier when I first said it. is this how it always happens?"

"""All your dreams will come true"", said my fortune cookie And the next day I realized, I went to work naked and couldn't run when I got chased by that monster"

"Me: Where the hell are you going with those balloons? 4yr: I need to wee! Me: With balloons?! 4yr: Its so much fun to wee with balloons"

"Teacher: In 1940 what were the Poles doing in Russia ? Pupil: Holding up the telegraph lines !"

"What kind of root is only easy to find on paper? *A square one.*"

"DATING TIP: Be a gentleman. Hold her door. Hold her hand. Hold her purse. Hold her for ransom. Demand a chopper. Fly away. Start a new life."

"I love the rain so fucking much It gets me wet."