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Joke of the Day

"Her:""my blinkers don't work I think I'm out of blinker fluid"" Me:""your car doesn't have blinker fluid."" Her:""I JUST SAID THAT PAY ATTENTION"""

"After reading your recent updates, I'm surprised that Facebook hasn't yet asked you, ""Whatever's on your mind, could you keep it to yourself?"""

"I'm gonna start my own TV network called RealityTV(RTV) and play nothing but music videos"

"Don't glare at me lady! You're the one who named your kid Marco then yelled his name in the store!"

"I got a new cat from the inner city shelter. So far he seems fine, except for needing to go outside every hour for a cigarette."

"Some nights I just lie down and stare up at the stars and I wonder what happened to my roof"

"Why don't black people go on cruises? They aren't falling for that again..."

"What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW. On a Porcupine the pricks are on the outside."

"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Who are we kidding, feminists can't change anything."

"I'm so poor I'm taking a vacation on Google Street View this year."